Monday, May 31, 2010

I Think - Byul

I refused to believe that it could be so,
There's no way that I'm in love with you,
I lied to myself that it's just a petty jealousy,
That I must be feeling lonely, but I cannot hide it anymore.

I think I love you
But it must be so, cause I miss you
Without you,
I cannot do anything,
And you are always on my mind,
So seeing this, it must be,
I was unaware,
But now I can see that
Your presence have delved deeply into my heart.

We are not meant for each other, and being friends is the best thing for us,
There isn't a single thing we have in common,
So I claimed there's no way we can be lovers,
But I don't want to make excuses anymore.

I think I love you
But it must be so, cause I miss you
Without you,
I cannot do anything,
And you are always on my mind,
So seeing this, it must be,
I was unaware,
But now I can see that
Your presence have delved deeply into my heart.

Why didn't I know that it was you,
Why couldn't I see it when it was right in front of me,
It was beside me all along,
But only now can I see love.

I think I love you
But it must be so, cause I miss you
Without you,
I cannot do anything,
And you are always on my mind,
So seeing this, it must be,
I was unaware,
But now I can see that
Your presence have delved deeply into my heart.

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Five months ago, I thought I would be introducing XYZ to my parents during my convocation
Now, I would be introducing Kurpeus to the FAMILY

Five months ago, I don't expect to be able to earn more than RM1K per month - i wanted to work in WATSON'S.
Now, the money paid to me is so far more than I would expect

Five months ago, I don't have any IDEA with what I should with my life
Now, I have my own goalS - KURPEUS and my M.Ed

Five months ago, Life is easy and unmeaningful -work,home,work,home
Now, not that it's not easy, but the things that have took place recently make me appreciate life more

I like my life now..that's all I can say

Dear GOD
Thank you for everything..

Monday, May 24, 2010


Sunday, May 23, 2010

had fun last saturday with the beloveds..kekekeke

Saturday, May 22, 2010



barang FaceShop best!worth buying..kekekeke..beli time sale memang la..
Truth is,everyone is going to hurt you. You just have to find the one worth suffering for

(Bob Marley,84)

Friday, May 21, 2010

just finished watching Ip Man 2..
aduh,bergaya sungguh Master Yip...
tapi rasanya Kurpeus lagi bergaya kot..
your ugly photos make my days
gila bitchy oke tonite..

will soon be a post graduate student on June 19th,2010..


finally, a great news after 20 hours of agony and pain..
hal kecik ja sebenarnya,tapi nangis cam ada orang mati..

saya rela tak dapat sekarang dari hilang awak (Kurpeus,2010)

Thursday, May 20, 2010

i don't like people to push me things that are not under my control
this kind of things lie in the hand of Allah
I can't provide you any excuse or reason for such thing
so please...
think wise before you give me such statement and questions

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

cinta hati..
we should do this more often..
I think Im getting better with it..

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Kurpeus: awak,skarang kita rasa lama kan nak tunggu tahun depan sampai..bayangkan,hujung tahun depan awak dah pregnant...cepat tak masa berlalu?cepatkan?


walaupun sudah start cuak memikirkan dia dah pikir hal-hal nak ada anak bersama...

takpe..saya tetap suka awak..

saya rela berdiskus hal-hal anak bersama..

aish..sudah semakin getek saya nie..

okeh..saya memang sangat dilamun cinta..

Monday, May 17, 2010

I want to be nice
so please let me be one
enough with the negatives vibes
I don't like it

If only

1. if I hesitate
it means I don't like you to be with us

2. I'm not easy to be pissed by
but it seems like you just know
where my hate/anger button is...
and stop saying I have problem controlling my anger
cos it ONLY happens when I'm with you.

3.get a life and your own friends will you?
stop trying to act cool
and interfering my life

4.ever heard the word LIMIT?
yes! you've gone beyond than you should to

5. Stop pushing me to tell you about my life
just be thankful that I've told you most of it
and please TRUST me with my decision making skill..
your decision making skill isn't that wise..
I'm old enough to make my own decision

6.Stop talking about others
I had enough of it
especially bad stuff..
I don't like to hear all your stories
it gives me bad vibes..
Did I tell u bad stories?I didn't, did I?
Shut up..

7.Stop saying I inherited this person and that person qualities
so what?
I rather be them, than be you..

emo gila kan?I seriusly have issues with this person...
ish ish ish ish..

a big achievement has been made

he can lift me..
kena berazam kuat2 dan berusaha bagus2 dan kuat2 untuk meringankan badan..
1st gift from him
a rose plush
chocolate (every one got it - baik hati kan dia)

aduh..kurpeus (lama suda kan nda panggil guna nama nie)
awak memang la pandai mencairkan hati saya lagi..

nak lagi hadiah..tapi tamao hadiah yang sama lagi..hahahaha

boleh kah?

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Alhamdullilah U have returned safely from your 5 days,4 night,7 hours drive journey...



Friday, May 14, 2010

Viva: Done!


seratus empat puluh tiga hari lagi

Thursday, May 13, 2010

this is what I do when I have nothing important to think of..

hey you!

good luck with your stochastic and fabuloustic thesis..

break a leg tomorrow!

dah tak rasa nak mengetek dengan lelaki lain..

lelaki lain kelihatan sangat membosankan..

"thanks for saving me and could you help me get the police car and ambulance car out there"
it's Thursday babeh!!
2 malam lagi..hohoho
Tomorrow: VIVA..

Good Luck!


Wednesday, May 12, 2010

esok akan tinggal seratus empat puluh empat hari...hohohohoho
Cinta hati,
jom pergi bercuti ke pulau selepas majlis konvokesyen saya dan rakan rakan kita..

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

I've been working for 4 months and half..and I think my mind set about certain things has definitely change..

I was a big spender I think..I spend a lot per month during my uni year..and I don't know and remember a bit where the money goes to..

The way I spend my money is the first thing that I notice..I am now more careful in the way I spend my money..At least, I can track back all the purchases I've made..

Before, Life was more about enjoying it to the fullest..Doing things for my own joy and happiness

Now, To me, life is a gift that should be spend doing exciting,adventurous and enjoying stuff with your loved ones - partner,family,best friends..

Love..I have been in many official and unofficial relationship..

Back then, LOVE was merely about being in a relationship with a man that treated me right..I want it because, that's what others did - being in a relationship..

Thinking back, I was clueless about love,man..

Not that I regretted all my past relationships, but I guess that's what make me appreciate the things I have at the moment..

My past relationships are not something that I like to talk about..I don't like it at all..

But I don't want to say that they were one of my many bad decisions..It seem to be a good decision back I don't think I wish to format my memory..

I love my life at the moment..

Yes..It has its own bumps and challenges..

That's what life is all about..Bitter Sweet

Allah loves me very much..and HE has sent me a nice guy..and I'm very thankful for that...

Though, life is not going the way I thought it would in January, I am grateful for everything happens for a reason..

My only hope is to be able to be a strong person and be able to endure all the challenges and bumps..


146 days

5 nights
he's leaving for four days..

for his and our future..hehehe

praying for lucks and his safe return


Monday, May 10, 2010

I know I look stupid in this, but he looks super nice...
It's hard to find him in a picture with a smile on his face
Don't give up..

from your beloved..
saya sayang mohd khairul bazli mohd aziz

Sunday, May 9, 2010

seratus empat puluh tujuh hari lagi

Waiting the right time to bake chocolate cake and cook pasta with creamy sauce..

Saturday, May 8, 2010

seratus empat puluh lapan hari


Friday, May 7, 2010

i didn't do well in the written test..


there were two sections needed to be completed in an hour time..

I only managed to do the part B - summary

Part A..hahaha..I didn't get to complete the essay..only did the intro and 2nd para..



If I didn't get to pursue my M.Ed, maybe because Allah has a better plan for me and us..


i love my new found friends


seratus empat puluh sembilan hari


Thursday, May 6, 2010

the interview went smooth sailing - maybe..

I don't know..I still have another stage to sit in - written test..

Hopefully it's an easy topic...

My beloved is at the moment 4 hours drive away from me..

Spending the weekend with the family for his VIVA will be next week..

Konon-konon minta restula tue..hehehe..

aish..cepatla tamat 150 hari..

dah tak sabar nak melancong..


einhundret und fünfzig Tage

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Photo taken from here

my only wish is, I want to be able to see rainbow for Forever and a decade
I so wanted to bake you brownies..

for you to bring back home.. konfiden ja sedap..

But I can't today..

Will do soon..

saya rasa saya banyak bersuka ria dan tidak fokus..

kena cepat cepat insaf..
I don't know how to handle my own stress..

Luckily I've found a perfect stress reducer..

He is better than lavender...oh,Arjun Rampal...^_^

Seriusly..I'm in stress..

I'll be sitting for an interview tomorrow and a written test on the day after tomorrow..

It's for my Master application..M.Ed to be precise...

aish..How la am I gonna go through it..

another life now is all about passing interview..

I don't like to be rejected..

Anyhow, in an optimist note-- even if I didn't pass this interview, maybe Allah has a better plan for me and 'us'...^_^

151 hari lagi

rindu kawan kawan serumah di shah alam..

Zureena = colourful blanket & red laptop

Rawaidah = sexy short & her new laptop

Zaza = baju kelawar & laptop..

I miss my student life..

I miss the simplicity of it..

I miss the feeling of procrastinating assignment..

I miss my sudden outing with friends to movie, mcd, subang, mid valley,

I miss hearing the yellow submarine song...

I miss paying the bills at BSN counter..

I miss my monthly visit to the great saloon near my house - u can't get a good saloon here in dungun..tut tut..

I miss reading academic books

I miss making mind map

I miss the smell of 17, Shah Alam

I miss the pasar malam

I miss the photocopy shop and it's sengal owner,Ah Meng

I miss buying breakfast from the stall in front of 7-E

I miss the pink mini bus

I miss TESL square

I miss Ausmat cafe

I miss the cuak feeling when I didn't wear my student card at the entrance

I miss the pressure of needing to do better in test or exam


I miss everything

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

♥♥♥♥ = ^_^


cepatla berlalu..

dah tak sabar menunggu..

152 hari..


Monday, May 3, 2010


Shahrizal Hussin

Please forgive me

For I've broken your heart..


You've broken my heart shattered into zillions pieces

I'm sorry for leaving you..I have to..

I'm sorry for not being able to fulfill my promises

but it's your fault too..

You do nothing to make me accept you back..

You weren't there for me when I need you

You broke your vows..

You never appreciate the things I've done for you..

I could list out lots of reasons..

and so do you..

The thing is..

Both of us are not meant for each other..

for that, I'M SORRY

I'm sorry for our relationship lasted for 2 years and 7 months

I'm sorry for I've wasted your time

I'm sorry..

You are a great guy..


It's just, I'm not for you, and you are not for me..

I'm sorry..

Forgive me for I've forgiven you..


saya memang sudah in a new relationship..

Too fast isn't it?

It's only been a month - saya dan incik Shah putus..

and it's been less than a month that I decided to be committed with a new man..

Yes..I've been hearing lots of talks - bad talks- about me and the new guy...

But hey! Love isn't something you can force..

You can't deny it..

and Yes..we can't glued people's mouth from creating evil stories or bad mouthing us..

and another YES,

This is the the hardest relationship I'm involved with..

and I really want to make this lasts FOREVER..

O' Dear Allah..

Please make everything goes well..

Please make everything goes OK..

for the both of US..
if you really love that person,

you won't do things you've done towards him...

I beg you


Throw away your evil thought and any related feeling towards him..

Stop the hatred...

Start a new life...

Get a new man..

I'm sorry if this is too sudden for you..

We didn't expect it to be this soon..

I really want us to be friend..

But it's not possible..I know..

yeay!It's Monday!!

I like going to work..


Sunday, May 2, 2010

Kadang² Allah sembunyikan matahari..
Dia datangkan petir dan kilat..
kita menangis dan tertanya-tanya,
kemana hilangnya sinar..
Rupa²nya.. Allah nak hadiahkan kita pelangi..
a straight 3-hours phone call is not enough..

I miss you damn much!

feels like her biological clock has started ticking after the recent trip to Gombak..

Viva cepatla..dah tak sabar nak ada family sendiri...huhuhu

this indeed is a getek post..

Saturday, May 1, 2010

head over heels in love with DBQ..


dah tak larat menanggung dah...

Semoga Viva anda lulus dengan minor alteration sahaja...